I know that I am probably going to be the youngest person to share a story but I wanted to do this because I want to let other people know that everybody has to go through whatever they go through. No matter how hard it is. It’s just life and I think I’m really starting to comprehend that. I know some people feel that because of certain people’s ages they are not able to understand certain things, but if I’m being honest I don’t care and still want to share this story. Before I do I just want to let anybody who’s reading this kind of long story know that we accept the love we think we deserve but trust me when I say that you’ll know when you deserve more. Last December I was sick with pneumonia and one of my best friends was going to have a party to celebrate her birthday but I couldn’t show up because I was told to rest.
I told her that I wasn’t going to show up but that I would give her the present I made when I got better. I had just finished helping our handyman built this entire hangout place that she and I had been working on. I was really proud and excited to show her. one of my friends asked if she could come over since I wasn’t going to the party. I remember telling her “I’m sick but sure”. I guess I was just tired of being lonely because I wasn’t going anywhere but the kitchen or my bed. after a few hours, I heard a knock on my door.
It was some of my guy friends that were supposed to be at the party. I was confused about why they were at my house and they said that they were only going to show up because I was going to be there. I understood that tho because my friend had invited many of my friends that she had only met once and I thought that was kind of unusual but I didn’t say anything to her because I just wanted her to have a good time on her birthday. They asked if I felt good enough to go to her party and I said yes. I felt like I was already with so many of my friends that I might as well go.
My friends and I went to her house and when I showed up I saw the entire party look surprised. I explained why I was there. After being there for like three minutes and talking to everybody one of the friends came up to me and said: “funny how u could’ve shown up with anybody else but u had to show up with the boy I like?” I just continued talking to everybody until one of the random girls from the party came up to me and said: “you really need to leave because you’re making you’re best friend cry on her birthday.” I went to go look for my friend who was throwing the party and saw her hands in her face and everybody around her was asking if she was okay. I was going to ask why she upset until people started pushing me to get out. I ended up getting chased by people out of the party.
I remember so many people were yelling at me and I didn’t know why. I had never had an entire party yelling at me before. I later found out that while they were trying to kick me out for no reason my guy friend had stolen all of there food from the kitchen.
My best friend had told everybody that they kicked me out just because they hated me and it wasn’t her fault. This person hurt me in so many different ways that I’m sad I let it happen so many times. After that happened I had never felt so lonely before. not long after this whole quarantine thing started so I can’t even make any new friends. I got a lot of “I’m so sorry” texts from people at the party but I didn’t reply to one. I just want friends that aren’t so insanely dramatic and can have fun with me. the reason why this hurt me so badly was that it was the person I felt closest to who did this. I did have a falling out with her before and she admitted what she did and said she was sorry. I trusted her twice. I just wish the things she said were true. I was the one that helped her plan the party that I would later get thrown out of.
This experience taught me that it’s not always right to reply on others for my happiness. Find the source of happiness in you and don’t rely on others to supply in the next time. I’m not saying to not be happy with your friends or even with somebody you love. When you love unabashedly give all of yourself and if ur going through a heartbreak or feeling bad it’s okay bc it’s normal. I know it can be doubtful when somebody does something u know isn’t right to u but trust me you’ll find the right people. I’m still waiting for the right people to come into my life but I’m only 13 so I think I have a lot of time.